Present progressive. Passive voice. It describes things that convey no story meaning. The sluglines are complex. The dialogue is all exposition. The prose style is literal and impersonal. No original images or details. Research errors. Bad grammar, usage and spelling. Improper format. Nothing happens. First pages are your resume. They show that you know what…
Read moreNotes from a Screenreader: The Bad Blind Date
nywift: Photo via Go Into the Story. You have a blind date. Nothing to go on, just a name. You smile, you shake hands, and then without preamble, your date sits down and launches into a monologue of therapy-grade personal disclosure. They tell you what the weather was like and what they were wearing during…
Read morePRO TIPS: THE REAL TIMOTHY COOPER
Timothy Cooper is one of the good guys, a writer/director who loves writers and stories and applying one to the other until a great screenplay pops out. Once a philosophy student at Yale, he went on to the Upright Citizen’s Brigade and developed his web series Concierge there while waiting for his feature script, Away…
Read moreOn the metamorphosis of a douchebag
On the metamorphosis of a douchebag dearcoquette: I used to play it off as being a hopeless romantic. I am actually calculating, manipulative, and emotionally stunted. I use my charisma to get what I want. How do I tell the girl I’m seeing that I’m basically Patrick Bateman? You’re not Patrick Bateman. Patrick Bateman… How…
Read moreCracking your story.
Read moreSILENCES
First of all, look at Shirley’s face. Second of all, I got a short script last week that just blew me away. It was in response to my “Yes, I will read for you” post, and this script is literally why I read, the very best reason to read – it makes me a better…
Read moreIf you are looking for your second act, check the first act exposition. Annerocious
Read moreIn screenplays, as in life, what people do is more important than what they say.
Read moreUPDATE YOUR ISSUES: MASCULINITY & FEMININITY
New stories with new angles grab attention. What if you wrote a story about a grizzled ex-marine whose head will explode if he resorts to violence? Or a woman who causes a natural disaster every time she gives in to her overbearing family? When you deliberately cut yourself off from slipping into cliche characters and…
Read moreMATRIX YOUR WAY THROUGH YOUR DRAFT
There are two kinds of scripts, Matrix scripts and Battery scripts (spoiler alert). Battery scripts convey information with words. Matrix scripts tell stories with images. The quickest way to make the jump is to start thinking about WITHHOLDING information. Using The Matrix as an example, because it’s a really good example, the story starts with…
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